I totally agree with the statement that nowadays companies give more attention to social skills of applicants when they employ new staff and I find it absolutely logical.

The advance of new technology over the last few decades has brought a significant shift to all spheres of commerce. However, the means of business communication have been influenced more dramatically due to the development of the Internet and mobile telephony industry.

First of all, these two factors themselves dictate the importance of social expertise among business people at all levels. It is an indisputable fact that a successful manager should be efficient in discussing deals on the phone and in some cases in taking part in video conferences over the Internet. The age of handwritten business letters is far behind; and consequently, a good command of interpersonal communication is one of the skills the companies want their employees to possess.

Furthermore , the ascendency of the internet has led to the globalization, the appearance of multinational companies and fierce competition in all industries. As a result, the interaction with both colleagues and clients has altered immensely. Being a good team player has become a must for an ideal employee of any business organization. Building up a rapport with the clients may be more important than giving them a good discount. The last two abilities are inseparable with excellent social skills.

To conclude, over the last few decades needs of companies have changed in response to the advance of new technology. Utilizing mobile telephones and Internet instead of hand-written correspondence, working in a team and under pressure of fierce rivalry – all these require social skills, and this is explicitly sought in the recruitment process.

Comments:
This is an upper intermediate level essay.
Good points: wide variety of uncommon vocabulary, complex sentence structures, points logically developed, clear essay structure
Minor weaknesses: some words and phrases are too informal for an essay.

In my opinion, childhood is often not the happiest time of a person’s life.

A Happy childhood always means happy reminiscences about the early years. The Love and care of one’s parents, exciting celebrations and holidays, safety, family dinners, the joy of getting presents – these all are the symbols of a person’s childhood happiness.

But do all children get the love, warmth and excitement of being a child they deserve. Do all people consider their childhood as the happiest time of their life? I would be happy to say “yes”, but the reality dictates the opposite answer.

Unfortunately, there are a lot of parentless children in the world who live either with a foster family or in an orphanage. These children get a lot of support from the State and there are always strict laws protecting their rights. However, not many of them are really happy because there is no substitute for the warmth of your own family.

It also happens, that growing up in a family situation may make a child suffer from a lot of hardship. Drink and drug addictions result in poverty and even cruelty to children in a family. Children often run away from such marginalized families, but it makes them even unhappier and vulnerable in the face of danger

It is painfully obvious, that wartime brings not only destruction and devastation to people and a country, but it hurts defenseless children most of all. My grandmother was a child during the Second World War. Her father was killed at the war, all her family was starving and she lost her sister who got sick and died. She will never recall her childhood without crying because it was the bitterest time of her life. However, my childhood was much happier and I have nothing to complain about.

To conclude, I have to say, that to agree with the statement, I have to change it - Childhood MUST BE the happiest time of a person’s life and adults MUST do their best to assure it. (334 words)

Comments:
Good intermediate essay, would be upper intermediate if ideas were developed further. Good use of emotional language and personal examples, grammar and vocabulary are correctly used.Some uncommon vocabulary correctly used, however much vocabulary is too common and informal. The use of “get” and “lot” should be avoided in an essay.

Some parent think that having a computer at home means that children waste their time on social networking and playing computer games .

I agree with this statement.

Firstly, children can’t control the time they spend in front of the computer. Besides that. parents often can’t control how much time their children spend in front of the computer because they are at work while their children play computer games. As for me, I am 16 years old and I am not a child. But sometimes I myself spend too much time surfing the net and playing computer games. Secondly, social networking may have bad influence on young people. They spend too much time on Facebook or Classmates and don’t go out, don’t have real relationship.

However, some people argue that computers are necessary in modern life both for children and adults. The main reason is that the internet is a great source of information Even computer games can be educational and social networking helps to connect people in different parts of the world.

I disagree with this point of view because there are much more cruel computer games than educational. It’s better to go to the library and to read a book than to surf the net for information.

In conclusion, I support the parents who don’t buy computers for their children, because children can’t control the time they spend in front of the computer (and because of social networking they don’t have real communication) (222words)

Comments:

An intermediate essay. Grammar correct, vocabulary used correctly in context.
Minor weaknesses: the language is too informal with contractions such as “can’t” . Repetition should be avoided through the use of synonyms and rephrasing. Grammar structures are limited and ideas are restated rather than elaborated.